Enough said

Fuck Broadbands

I can’t believe my broadband bills is over a hundred. Now my mum have to for a mere minutes of broadband from my phone.

I was a bit upset bout this cause I don’t like to disappoint my mum. Especially with financial issues. From sewing classes to school projects, I used (or at least try to use) my own money from my weekly allowance and try to accommodate from that ratio. It hurts to know that she’s paying off for something I carelessly did.

I need to have a part time job. And I’m not even kidding. I’ve to support myself, financially, to fund for everything. I’m a big boy now, and I hate taking money from my elders. In times like this, I wonder the things I do for free is giving justice to the substantial talent I had.

What my brother said is true, let them pay you so that they appreciate your talent.

SO, if anyone out there with a job stint, please have a heart and keep me posted.

Much love.

Tattoos on skin, not hearts.

It’s 12:44 am now and I have no clue why I’m writing this post at this ungodly hour. Especially when the start of the school week is just hours away. I’m not fond of sleeping late but I can’t sleep.

I hate it how I can handle things much better. To channel my aggression into evanescent and to see things clearly. The latter part however, I can manage to deal with it but it’s just disappointing to know that promises are broken. Especially when you held dear with someone you know for the longest time, someone who you shared much relations with, someone who’s always there for you and vice versa.

I remembered crying on the phone in the middle of the night. Heartbroken after the clock strikes 12. The reasons why I remembered that were, one, that’s the most heartbreaking moment I had from a failed relationship. Second, that was the time when you were there for me when I needed you the most. I didn’t care bout your failed attempts to counsel me, but I was grateful enough you picked up the phone and spare me hours to just be there on the other line, knowing that your existence is there for me to be at emotional safety.

And now, with the state of you being so ‘out of place’, I wonder whether I’m losing a friend. You’re with someone now. I can understand. I still have issues with him with regards to the innocuous comment. I feel like there’s always something that makes our relationship much difficult when one of us is happier or much of a better state than others. I always ponder over the things we use to share and pinky promise over things. All I can do now is be wary over the fact that I am letting you drown into your own mistakes. And I’m scared that I’m restricting you to be happy and finally be who you wanna be.

I don’t know. One thing is for sure that some things in this world isn’t permanent. Love, faith, things that you hold on dearly to move on to the next day, hoping that the tables will turn and you’d get the be on the other side where it’s greener. Owing to the fact that you had done your best, things are never permanent. Cause if they do, well, that’s the banality of life.

Fariz Zoe

My good friend Zameer came to my crib for me to style him up for Halloween. No, my past garments are not costume-y neither it’s theatrical at all. Albeit that, he pulled off the avant garde fashion monstahrica that we expected. I can see that Zameer was please by what he saw.

And then I realise, I love fashion so much. Why? Fashion can make you so happy about such banality. With that being said, I love making people happy. Seeing people wearing my stuff and feeling gleeful with how awesome they look at the mirror makes me want to work more and more.

I thought of to scrap the idea of having a collection due by January. But to think again, I want to do it. Not for myself now, but for others to enjoy. I always have this principle in life and that is to never see fashion as a business but rather as an art form. Wearable art so to speak.

Never mind if I don’t get any money now from making clothes. Happiness makes the world goes round and round…

And I’m very tired nowadays.

:)

I made it into the Director’s List for first semester. Awesome!

The awful part however is that I got a reputation to uphold, and I’m just afraid that I fail to do so for the coming semester. Even so, I am honestly shocked to be in the director’s list, considering the fact that I had C’s in my result and I didn’t put MUCH effort for a particular module due to the fashion event.

But I have to say that I’m so thankful to God for making this so far.

So, when’s my iPod touch coming right up for me?!

Fariz J Fall/Winter Capsule Collection 2009